How did you get interested in agriculture? And what are you hoping to gain from your apprenticeship?
May 2025
I stumbled into agriculture when I was in my first year of college, but I guess maybe I was always interested in it. Growing up in Petaluma, California I was surrounded by ranches and dairy farms and the people who they belonged to. I loved animals, being outside, and of course driving a big truck. When I moved to college to study engineering, I never really felt like I fit in with the other people in my classes. I was struggling in the same subjects that I excelled at in high school and I felt so out of touch with the goals I had set for my future. On a whim, I went with a friend to tour the school dairy farm, she was an Animal Science major.
Now I don’t remember entirely what happened in the year following that day, but I came out the other side a Dairy Science major, just starting as a Milker for the Cal Poly Dairy. From then on I poured everything I had into my work at the dairy and into my studies. I love learning about how cattle work on the inside and how they react to their environment on the outside. I also am incredibly grateful to have found myself surrounded by people who are like me! My friends in engineering were nice, but there’s nothing that compares to building relationships with people who have the same values, passion, and work ethic as I do.
Building relationships with other people in agriculture is one of the most significant things I am looking forward to about this apprenticeship. I hope to create lasting bonds with mentors and peers alike that will help support me in my future. Of course, I also look forward to everything I can gain from being on my site. There are so many hard skills that I can practice and improve on here that will help me become a more confident worker. My mentor is also an incredible wealth of knowledge when it comes to reading animals and the land and I know there is so much I can learn from him. In addition to growing as a worker and as a student, throughout this apprenticeship I aim to grow as a person! This opportunity can push my limits, offer me new perspectives, and challenge me to become a better version of myself.
Final Reflections
November 2025
I started this season by leaving behind a life that I had just begun to build. After living away at college, and spending summers working in different places, I returned to my hometown in California. I was getting settled back in, creating a new routine, and beginning to see myself actually living there. Of course, I had applied to the apprenticeship and intended on moving away again, but after being rejected by 4 of the 5 sites I had interviewed with, it was only natural to pivot to a new plan: Stay in CA. Get married. Raise chickens? (Yeah the plan was a little murky, but I was pivoting ok!?) When the Coulters offered me the position on their ranch I had a big decision to make. I decided to stick with the original plan (reverse pivoting?), but there was a lot more heartache involved than I had anticipated.
As my apprenticeship began, I was constantly wrestling with the decision I had made and second guessing myself. This anxiety spilled over into everything I did at work too. Wondering if I was doing things the way my mentor would have done it, or if I was going to the right place, or doing the right thing, or using my time well, or bothering my NAP Manager too much, or, or, or… It was exhausting. It still is. While I would love to say that I overcame this and became a strong, confident person, and everything came out sunshine and rainbows at the end, that’s not the truth. That anxiety is part of who I am, I have carried it with me for years and I will continue to do so for the foreseeable future.
This season was hard for a lot of reasons. If you think being 22 years old is easy, go listen to Mel Robbins’ podcasts about being in your 20’s. Despite the challenges I faced (both tangible ones and those I made up in my head), I still learned and grew and learned again and grew some more. I made new friends and professional connections. I connected with an amazing group of people who love me and care about me thanks to Quivira and NAP. I formed bonds with people who I can imagine will be in my life for a very long time.
I’m especially grateful to the amazing women who talked me through spirals, nursed me when I was sick, and cheered for even the smallest of my wins. I never would have met them if I chose the comfortable life I was sliding into in my hometown. They inspire me to keep chasing new adventures and remind me to take a look back every now and then to see how far I’ve come.
I really wanted to grow this season by becoming more comfortable with being alone. While I still enjoy the company of others more than my own, I am a lot more comfortable with solitude. Between living alone and spending much of each day working independently, I had to get used to it. I also had to learn, much like an infant, that even though nobody is around at the moment, it won’t be that way forever. I wish I didn’t still rely so heavily on distractions like music, audiobooks, and podcasts when I’m working alone but that can be a goal for the future. I also hope I can keep improving how I use my free time. Cooking, cleaning, reading, and relaxing outside are all much better than scrolling Instagram reels or binging “Switched at Birth” (again).
In spending time alone at work, I have become more confident in my decision making skills and I spend less time trying to figure out exactly how my mentor would do things if he was there. I practiced skills I had very little experience in until they became boring everyday tasks. Things like hooking up a trailer, setting up polywire, managing water troughs, and operating a bale bed were things I couldn’t have done a couple of years ago, but are now mundane. I also learned how to interact and work with neighbors, and (through some trial and error) I learned how to exist in such a tiny community. (Having a population of about 370 people, news tends to travel very fast in Jordan, Montana so watch out!) Most everyone I met has been incredibly kind, welcoming, and encouraging. Some are even trying to convince me to stay, which is working so far.
One of the larger impacts this apprenticeship has had on me was a true introduction to regenerative agriculture. Largely through NAP programming and encouragement from the otherapprentices, I was able to learn what that really looks like. Prior to this experience, I was only exposed to conventional agriculture practices. Now I know that there are lots of ways of doing things, and efficiency isn’t always the only goal. This is something I fear I will have to continuously re-learn as I am incredibly efficiency-minded. That trait served me very well when I was studying to work in the dairy industry, but I have come to realize that there can be more important things. Some of those things include promoting general ecosystem health, creating the most nutritious foods we can, and having the capacity to slow down and enjoy our human experience. I greatly value all of the book, podcast, and video recommendations that my peers have offered me. At first I felt overwhelmingly guilty for not knowing what they knew, or not spending all of my free time studying. Later, I realized how significant it was for me to even care at all about improving agriculture. Regenerative ag is all new to me, and I think it’s okay for me to just exist in this space for a little while and learn what I can. Maybe one day I can save the world or whatever, but for now I need more practice with the basics! My future is even less clear than it was when I started this program. I don’t know where I will be or what I will be doing within the next few months or years. I do know for sure that I want to live on a ranch for as much of my life as possible. I also know that regenerative practices are important to me and I can’t forget that. There are more technical skills that I want to learn and I know that I need to prioritize them when choosing my path forward. I aim to fill the gaps in my education and experience so far while working to become a well-rounded agricultural professional.
I have more goals for my personal growth too, like being more relaxed and confident in my independence. It’s incredibly difficult to imagine what my future will look like. I am faced with an overwhelming amount of possibilities and very few guiding factors. There are things that I want in my future that I am going to have to work very hard for. Things like an agricultural career that I’m proud of, a daily routine that brings me joy, and a loving, supportive community. While the next step for me isn’t obvious, I do know the values that I’m going to carry with me. I also have a belief that as I learn and grow, my path will become ever clearer. I am excited for my future knowing that I have a lot of really amazing people walking with me every step of the way. I owe one big thank you to the 2025 NAP Staff, to my mentors, and to my fellow apprentices for welcoming me as a New Agrarian and supporting my continued education. This season may be over but you can’t get rid of me that easy!